"And any time you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain

Don't carry the world upon your shoulders
For well you know that it's a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder."

the music i found through a passion i once knew before never changed as i changed.

yet as my thoughts and understanding of this society change and constantly evolve...
the people i want to surround myself with changes.
changes constantly for i am always changing rapidly how i view things.
2
3
4
years.

i need to change the humans.
sometimes i don't want to but they are changing differently than i or not at all.
they come to a plateau of mundane standstill.

i asked you all
and you told me spiritual teacher
but what does that mean?
how do i do that when i find it hard to listen to their words?

please show me
is this a change i need?
or am i overreacting?
allowing my ego feelings to once again take control?

i guess...
i am just asking for your help now.
help to learn and help to teach.

"You'd say I'm putting you on
But it's no joke, it's doing me harm
You know I can't sleep, I can't stop my brain
You know it's three weeks, I'm going insane
You know I'd give you everything I've got
for a little peace of mind."

i know you all will be there.

ccold ccold cold
shivers course through my body

i am drawing myself away from people i once knew and cherished deeply.
i don't know why.
my life lesson. (sssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss)

i will never stop learning.
i will never stop changing.

patience.
i need to practice.

my deeper parts of my soul has always resisted the norm.
they all think i have conformed.
people i know i don't really know and they don't know me at all.

i am the only one who truly knows me and even that is still a mystery.

so much turmoil going on all around me.
people getting angry, frustrated, hurt.
i still get the anger i once knew a few years ago but it has learned to be replaced.

with all this happening,
i still feel deep down that there is nothing to be afraid of.
everything will be ok.

don't be too afraid.
don't be too sad.

oh, happiness.
how do you show others this forgiveness?

two thought and thousand 12/12/

everyone who is everyone is right about their theory.
end of the world?
end of time?
it's going to seem that way.

everything must reach a peak of no return before it starts to level out again.
peace.

we are living the peak of hell's mountain right now.

Greed and evil must make itself so overt and unbearable for humans to all finally stand up and say enough is enough.
but another thought...
what if it's not becoming more overt?
what if humans are just becoming more aware?
their awareness making the evil seen.
spiritual awakening?

we are all about to live out some interesting times.
times before time does not exist anymore.

Celestine
Gaia
Estrella
Skye
Griffyn
Aliyana
Poet
Maeve
Michael
Raphael
Ariel
Jude
Moon
Cecilia
Pan
Story
Sunny
Nirvana
Lennon
Malcolm
Salvador



Who knows what name you will be given my beautiful babies?

I think I will know when my soul physically meets yours.

Oh!

i want to run through the forests
pet the unicorns
fly with the bluebirds
paint with the butterflies
with Ariel by my side.

i want to stand up for those who can't
climb the highest rainbow
walk the streets without fear
jump down the waterfall
with Michael by my side.

i want to express my truth to those i love
know complete forgiveness
love
with Uriel by my side.

i want to heal his heart ultimately
wipe away all those tears
eradicate the scars humans have caused
obliterate pain we create
with Raphael by my side.

i want to give birth to new lives
know the love a mother knows
show the love i know her and i have
with Gabriel by my side.

i want to drift on music notes
help him change the hearts
heal the negativity
with Chamuel by my side.

i want to open all my chakras
have no doubt
see, hear, feel, think
with Raziel by my side.

i would be nothing without you by my side, beautiful angels.

goodnight, i love you.

Begin

banana cream pie
Land Before Time

yeah, that must have been nice.
2012 2012 2012 2012 2012 2012 2012 2012
the last man made year?

Bluebird come take me away.
Fly me to the moon.
moon
moon moon moon
goddess.

black doll with the ash face.
brown bunny
b b b b b b b b b b b b b b b b b b b b b

i will walk barefoot to my death.
or should i say my being.

i am jealous of those who "die"
for a moment....
then i am happy.
they have completed their purpose, learned their lessons.
i will soon join them...
my work is just not yet done.

i may cry some tears but i simply see that as a human accommodation thing to do.
my ego cries.
my higher self rejoices.

death as a human is a curious thing.
the energy depletion shock, the loss of the material is the only thing that will hurt the ego.

i am not afraid of leaving this life.

i honestly can not wait.

but i have yet served my purpose here.
there are still people i need to teach.
there are still people that need to teach me.

it is so comforting to think of being rid of this body one day.
to be in Heaven, free.
more free than i even know what it means.

i wonder what it is like all the time.

GROUND YOURSELF.

i know,
present,
i am here now.

i do not

end

Lightning Bolt

Shark Attack.
Heart Attack.

The number one killer is terrorism....oB(ush)ama

what is change?
what is hope?
Can it be found in one single human being?

Or are they simply the spark to the powder keg of humanity's truth?
But then, what is truth?

My truth does not match your truth.

And, can those sparks of fire be false?
man-made versus nature

i like to listen to humans voices floating in sync with heaven.
Chamuel, free us please.
i like to lie here listening to God's music, forgetting what i can not change.

They say music eliminates and balances energies.
But, what music do you choose to listen to?

Light blue auras mean clairaudience.
Please Michael take away my remaining doubt, I sometimes think I am still talking to myself.

"But is not Heaven within you?"

I see them. I see my beautiful angels always.
They whisper in my ears.
They stroke my hair as i fall asleep.
They sit in the back of my car as i drive home at midnight, scrunched up so that i can't help but laugh.
They stand by my side as i lay on the doctor's table.
They come when i know i have made a mistake.
They come when my past catches up to me.

They are here right now.